Here is Cuban singer Christina Millian at the Metro PCS 5 Boro Takeover Tour at the Brooklyn Academy of Music in Brooklyn, New York yesterday.

When I first saw Christina with blonde hair the other day, I decided to close my eyes real tight and X out of the screen, because I thought maybe then it would all just go away. Why must girls continue to dye their hair blonde, even if it doesn’t suit them? Maybe Barbie should be outlawed after all. 

I used to have blue in my hair back in the day, but at least the blue went with my Rican skin color. I don’t think olive-skinned Latinas should be rockin’ the blonde look. Even if the carpet matches the drapes, it just doesn’t make sense. Kinda like eyeball tattoos and fisting. It’s like, I get it, but not really.

Christina Milian looks like the attractive version of this chick I went to high school with that was a total total total total butter face.  She was in the top five equestrian riders in the world for her age, and as a result had a tight ass body she proudly flaunted with tight jeans and thongs at the beach.

Problem was, her face was so busted she had confidence issues and as a result became a total whore always in search of love and attention from whomever she could get it from. By age 19 she’d had over 100 d!cks inside her. Why? Because she’s classy like that.

Kinda makes me wonder how many seeds Christina Milian’s ass has swallowed in comparison.  She seems like a good girl, so I’m definitely guessing less than 100.  In any case, Christina has a sweet ass, and zero butter face, so let’s just sit back and admire, shall we?

Here’s her fine ass out and about in West Hollywood, California last night.

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One dress and a couple drinks later and singer Christina Milian wound up giving photographers what they wanted while leaving a West Hollywood nightclub earlier this week. Its not the entire filet-o-fish, but there definitely is some exposed skin action going on.

Christina’s beauty wasn’t enough to catapult her into the level of fame she undoubtedly desired.  Never having come close to the ranks of Britney or the other Christina that dominated the pop charts years ago, she’s now associated more with late night outings and sexy dresses. And frankly, that’s fine with me.  Having Madonna and The Pussycat Dolls in the market is already bad enough.

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If peacocks flaunt their colorful feathers to get the attention of the opposite sex, and dudes with small penises drive big trucks, then what does that make Christina Milian in this outfit?

No, seriously. That’s the clue to this crossword puzzle I’m doing right now.  If I get the answer I win a year’s supply of AstroGlide. The purple bottle, not the red one.  Do you know what I can do with a years supply of AstroGlide?  Lots and lots of butt sex. I mean, tons.

Christina Milian certainly knows how to garner some attention.

The singer arrived at the Apple Lounge Opening in West Hollywood, California yesterday looking fresh-faced and toned in an all white ensemble that effortlessly flaunted her shapely legs, toned arms, and most of all, succulent pectoral muscles (aka, boobies!).

Someone’s workout regiment has most certainly been paying off. What women wouldn’t want to have that body?  Moreover, what man wouldn’t want to experience that body…on him… under him… and on the side?

Singer Christina Milian having lunch with her mom at Sunset Plaza in West Hollywood earlier this week.

Write Your Own Fantasy: Christina is fantasizing about __________________.

How well does Mariah Carey really know husband Nick Cannon? After all, the couple tied the knot in a quickie wedding in the Bahamas last week after just one month of dating.

Pop singer Christina Milian didn’t hold back during a recent interview about Nick Cannon, whom she dated for three years starting in 2006.

Milian says, “All the time we were together, I heard nothing. No rumors, no gossip, and then all of a sudden I’m in Romania and I start hearing stuff. I did something no woman should do, but sometimes you’re entitled to … and I think a lot of women do it.”

Milian insists that she and Cannon are no longer even friends after Cannon finally admitted he cheated on her several times with a string of different women throughout their three-year relationship.

She fumes, “The whole time with different girls, not just one, but different girls. He said to me that these girls helped his ego and made him look good.”

Cheating and recycled wedding rings? Wow, Nick Cannon sounds like a real winner.

Here’s Afro-Cuban cutie Christina Milian at the launch of Victoria’s Secret “Heavenly Kiss” at Besos restaurant in Hollywood, California yesterday.

Afro-Cuban actress Christina Milian attended the opening of DCMA Collective’s flagship store in L.A. yesterday.

I figure this hot piece of trash Christina Milian is wearing is part of DCMA’s clothing line. Either that or Christina’s stylist hates her. Girl looks like she’s heading to the gym to work on her punches.

Had she just focused in on that sweet cleavage of hers, all would’ve been forgiven. Instead she drowned out them breastesses of hers with her hair. As if any of us care about that.