Would You Like To Send Bernie Madoff Love Letters in Jail?

MadoffMail.com is a jaunty high-concept website in the vein of “Look at This F*cking Hipster” (which you should certainly look at, if you haven’t yet), except instead of featuring terrible hipsters looking terrible, it has songs from the hearts of pissed-off Jews sounding pissed off.  This it promises:

On June 29, 2009, Bernard Madoff was sentenced to 150 years as inmate #61727-054 at the Metropolitan Correctional Center in New York City.

Whether you were one of his victims or not, now’s your chance to tell him how you feel.

You simply use electronic mail to send your feelings to MadoffMail.  Then…  

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Tennis Player Suspended for Betting Found Dead at 24

This is a story you’ll hear more about I think: a French tennis player, Mathieu Montcourt, was found dead in his apartment building, of unknown causes.  This is extra sensational because 1) Montcourt was 24 and obviously in a more prime physical condition than most of us will ever see, and 2) Montcourt was recently banned from the French tennis federation for five weeks for wagering on games.  The ban was to take effect the day Montcourt died.

“[His girlfriend] was with a friend in Mathieu Montcourt’s apartment,” Dominguez said. “They came out after a while, having left him messages, and noticed that he was lying on the floor next to his bike … They called the (ambulance), but unfortunately he was already dead.”

So, an unusual place to commit suicide, and an unlikely action to take, given that his suspension was not particularly severe…  

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No One Ever Suspects the Nigerian Scammers Will Use Puppies

I have to imagine that these are harsh times for Nigerian email scammers.  Theirs isn’t exactly the freshest game in town – the whole “Repressive government froze my assets and I need to put the remainder of my royal fortune in your bank account for safekeeping” case has a lot of holes in it,  and email scams have been a punchline for as long as I can remember the internet existing.

Plus in these times of economic difficulty, it’s like, sorry your government froze your assets, but SunCruz Casino froze my assets, in a manner of speaking, and… I wish I could help, but I don’t have a “bank account” in the traditional sense.  Any more.  But scammers are wily like its their job, so they’re taking unusual measures to separate your money from you.

“I didn’t think they’d use puppies,”she said.

You never think they’ll use puppies.  

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Lindsay Lohan Looks Busted On Her Birthday

I am fairly sure I saw this exact creature trying to buy meth on skid row OUTFIT & ALL.  Perhaps the worst part of this all is that it’s Lindsay Lohan’s 23rd birthday party at Wet Republic at the MGM Grand Hotel & Resort in Las Vegas.  How awesome for her too, she doesn’t look a day over 50.  Geez, when is someone going to let Lindsay know that she looks like a 48-year-old busted Vegas hooker and not a cutting edge sex symbol of our generation?

Just, wow.  Check out more photos after the jump>>>

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“The Hangover”: Based on a True Story?

New Hollywood insider-type info is suggesting that The Hangover was not merely an off-the-cuff fantasy dreamt up by screenwriters Scott Moore and Jon Lucas and director Todd Phillips, but rather an embellishment of a studio player’s actual story.  Producer Chris Bender has done such actual historical movies before:

This is the 3rd time he’s taken a real-life Hollywood producer’s life story and put it on the big screen. You may already know this, but American Pie is based on Bender’s high school experiences. Jason Biggs plays Bender, who got a producer credit on the pic. AndJust Friends also was based on Bender’s life and he got a producer credit.

In the case of The Hangover, the real setting was indeed a Vegas bachelor party gone wrong and the real story went like this…  

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Review Roundup: "The Hangover"

Blackout humor is a little played out, so I was skeptical when I first saw a trailer for The Hangover, the bachelor party in Vegas blackout comedy that’s in theaters today.  What happened last night?  I lost a tooth!  OMG where did this baby come from?  Where did this tiger come from??  Where did this Mike Tyson come from???  Where’s the groom?!!

And yet I laughed, at each one of the like a dozen trailers that the studio has flung at viewers of the types of TV shows I view.  Here’s what reviewers are saying:  

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21 Ways to F*ck Up Blackjack

Blackjack – that’s the easy table game that even casino lightweights can understand and win at, right?  WRONG.  There are many subtle rules and restrictions you may not know.  For example, if you say, “Hit me!” in a casino, it transgresses security codes and is grounds for a bullet in the side of your head.  Most of what I just said is true.  Still want to play, big guy? 

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