Old School Michael Jordan Commercial For Gentle-Treatment Hair Relaxer [Video]

In 1986 Michael Jordan was just looking to get paid, which is likely why he agreed to do this commercial for Gentle-Treatment Relaxer. Years later, it was Coke, Nike, McDonalds and Hanes, to name a few.

The music (little Luther?), the story-line, Jordan macking on some female reporter; this commercial has it all! It’s funny to think that the world’s greatest basketball player of all time at one point in his career had to do such things as film commercials in which he drops a line like, “Can I do a story about you?”  A commercial for ladies hair product!

I guess it goes to show, things do get better, kids!

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The Original Apple 1 Could Be All Yours Next Month

Well, that’s if you’re willing to drop about three times your yearly salary on the great granddaddy of the computer. Find out more about the Apple 1 after the jump.

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This Is Awesome: Making Harmonicas Out Of Nintendo Cartridges

You remember them. The clunky, unattractive cartridges you had to stuff into your old-school Nintendo. And sure they worked great for a while, bringing Mario, Luigi and eighty-three different versions of Zelda to your bedroom on a huge convex-screen television. But then one day you flipped the switch and nothing happens. Or you got some weird snowy mess on the screen. What is a kid to do in a time before Geek Squads and IT departments across this great nation? Blow on them! All it took were a few puffs on the cartridge (and maybe a shake or two) and you were right back in business.

I miss those days, when all it took were a few blows to get the fun started again. Ok, so maybe things haven’t changed that much (mind is definitely in the gutter), but apparently some people have taken that idea and ran with it. Introducing Nintendo cartridge harmonicas. Now available on eBay, these bits of musical awesomeness were created by a Nintendo modder with clearly too much time on his hands. But either way, they’re pretty cool and are a nice early 90s throwback for any video gamer lover.

Via: Asylum via Streetlevel

Miley Cyrus Says The Internet Is Kind Of Lame, Dangerous…We Say She's Kind Of Dumb

Blame all celebrity woes on Twitter according to Miley Cyrus. After ditching her constant tweeting last fall, Miley is now speaking out about how lame the Internet and Twitter is:

“I was kind of tired of telling everyone what I’m doing. I hate when I read things and celebrities are complaining, like, ‘I have no personal life.’ I’m like, well, that’s because you write everything that you’re doing.”

Ok Miley, I’m not sure if anyone broke the news to you, but no one ever really cared what you were doing to begin with. The only time anyone over the age of 12 cared what Hannah Montana was up to was when she decided to hop on a stripper pole and start bumping and grinding all over the place. But Miley didn’t stop there with her Internet bashing. She went on to describe the perils of social networking to the kiddie set:

“I’m telling kids, ‘Don’t go on the Internet. It’s dangerous, it’s not fun, it wastes your life. And you should be outside playing sports or something.”

Playing sports or something? Really Miley? I don’t think that kids need to be engaging in the sort of extracurricular activities you gravitate toward.

Via: US Magazine

Cool New Trick To Impress Your Friends! Involves Shoes and Wine!

Skip to about halfway through the video, watch it, and don’t ever say I never did anything for you.

Are these guys speaking Russian?  I think they are, because in Soviet Russia… drinking has YOU problem!

Actually no, it works the same way over there as it does here.  But speaking of problems, has anyone been watching Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew?  Those people have a really problematic amount of sex!  They’re like, “It’s ruining my life, the fact that I have sex with so many women all the time.”  On the one hand, addiction is a very serious and traumatic psychological condition suffered by millions of Americans every day.  On the other hand, f*ck you, xtreme athlete who wears sunglasses inside and brings his damn surfboard to rehab.

Via VideoSift.

Important Fashion News: Hard Guys Wear Skirts Now

Like most men, I know a ton of things about fashion and spend as much of my time as possible caring about it.  But I’m learning new things every day!  For instance, have you heard that skirts are for guys now?  True story.  Skirts, or as male wearers prefer to call them, “legs shirts” are a super hot new thing in Japan, and they’re coming to a man’s body near you.  Possibly even your own!  From an English-language paper in Japan:

Called “the skirt boys,” or “skirt tribe,” the skirt-wearing men of Tokyo are beginning to get some attention from the fashion world.  And so, though it may be a little rude, I have to ask: How is this different from being a cross-dresser?

Hey, some guys join the lacrosse team, other guys join the skirt tribe.  To each his own.  Not everyone has to be a pants boy.  But in answer to the hard-hitting and ever-thorny cross-dressing question…

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Stupid Celebrity Gift Ideas: Happy Birthday Katy Perry Edition

What do you get for the girl who has everything?  If you think buying gifts for your gal is hard, imagine if she were a celebrity.  You can only buy so many Hummers before the Hummer Room is full and/or you’ve already gone through all the factory colors.  You can only destroy so many island resort penthouses with her in a days-long happy birthday cocaine rage before the other island resorts start to wonder if hosting a celebrity couple is worth replacing all the plasma screens that wind up the Jacuzzi.  You can only pay $36 million upfront to send her up on the shuttle as a space tourist only to have her back out of flight training because the zero-gravity chamber gives her hair split ends, before you start running out of $36 million sums of money.

So give credit to British comedian/VJ/wanker/tosser/cobbler (new British insult for lazy and doltish individuals) Russell Brand, who has procured a most unusual gift for his lady Katy Perry on the occasion of her 25th birthday.  He got her…  

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Ron "Typewriter" Mingo: Lightning-Speed Typist, Pro Baller, Smooth Operator

For a time, for a brief, golden time enshrined only in moth-eaten local newspaper clippings and age-warped public access television tapes, Ron “Typewriter” Mingo was the fastest, flyest typist in the whole world.  Folks always said there was something a little strange about Ron Mingo growing up, the tall, lanky youth who preferred his desk to the rope swings and ice cream parlors the rest of the kids liked.  ”He’s a strange boy, that Ron Mingo,” they said.  ”But by God, can he type.”

By high school, young Ron was typing 118 words per minute, by college, 140.  As an adult, Ron could type over 160 words every minute on his trusty manual Smith-Corona, Pegasus (he was the only man in the world with the carpal strength to tame her).  He was fired from 25, 30 jobs.  ”You’re too fast,” they would say.  ”No man should be able to type so fast.  It ain’t right.”  ”Type too close to the clouds,” they warned him, “and the Lord’s liable to delete you.”  But Ron Mingo would just smile, and tap away.

After the jump, groovy ’70s video of be-leisure-suited pro football and pro baseball player Ron “Typewriter” Mingo, the fastest typist in all the land.  

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1987 Dating Video Clearly Made by the Varsity Dating Team

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We men are fond of calling ourselves simple creatures.  Being complex and inscrutable and many-faceted – that sh*t comes free with your second X chromosome, goes the thinking.  Guys just want to be loved and encouraged and allowed to try unusual sex moves, goes the thinking.  Well, girls, sorry to say, but it’s all an act.  Some of us are totally complicated.  Like this bespectacled fellow, short in stature, but long in dating requirements: ”No fatties, no hamsters, no dopers, no smokers, no alcoholics, no Donna Juanitas, no posers.”  Overweight Donna Juanita hamsters, please take your wares elsewhere.  But then, others of us are simple enough creatures when in the glandular universe of smile and touch.  ”Life is a playground and I want someone to play with,” lisps the parted-hair man in the bright red sweater with the shirt collar tucked into it.

Are you the goddess?

Via BoingBoing.

Swedish Thieves Commit the Perfect Bank Robbery

Sweden is cool enough.  But not really badass-cool, for the most part.  Sweden is definitely a lover, not a fighter (both have merits!).  But this story out of Sweden is making me rethink that apparent truth.

With cinematic flourish, the masked robbers dropped from a helicopter onto the roof of a Swedish cash depot before dawn, broke into the building through a glass pyramid, set off explosions to get to the millions inside and escaped by hoisting themselves and their haul back up on rope lines.

All in 20 minutes, and all while Stockholm police were grounded by a fake bomb planted outside their own helicopter hangar.

Even the helicopter was stolen.  That is some Batman sh*t, if Batman undermined social institutions and were Swedish.  Two more details really bring this home…  

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