Well, there you have it folks.  Back by popular demand, Tiffany ‘New York’ Pollard will return to television with VH1’s new reality show New York Goes to Hollywood.

That poor Marilyn Monroe.  She had a hard life on earth and now skanks like Lindsay Lohan and New York are crapping on her afterlife too.

Here are the new promos of Tiffany for the reality show.  Scary.

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I love women like Audrina Patridge because they think they’re so slick when in all reality they’re at your mercy.  Take the bruise on her face, for example.

She can casually lean over while laughing and show us some cleavage all she wants, but when a dude wants to c()ck slap her face she takes it.

Women like this will never know the definition of love, nor toe-curling orgasms.  While everyone else is unleashing their inner nympho during sex, she’ll still be posing the entire time like the fake that she is.  Half the time girls who try to sell their sex appeal are asexual to begin with.  It’s just a game to them.

Here’s Audrina and her c()ck slapped face shopping along Melrose Avenue yesterday.

SplashNews

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Heidi Montag decided to torture us again with yet another single.  To hear the song with the original title “Fashion,” click here.  Synthesizing the hell out of her voice still can’t save this disaster.

To make matters worse some allegedly reputable questionable producer named RedOne spoke to Us Magazine about the Heidi and the new single produced by him.

I blame this on Apple’s Garage Band.  Now every idiot thinks they’re a producer because the clicked a few buttons on their computer.

Can Heidi sing?
“Definitely. She’s really good, and I love her personality and the way it comes through in a song. She makes you believe it. She’s great in the studio.”

Where do you see her career going?
“I definitely think she’s a star. She has a star quality — a powerful personality with no limits. She can do anything and make it sound credible. She’s a born star.

Heidi is so far removed from knowing what a real star is she’s probably let Spencer shove a beer can up her snatch after he told her that what porn stars do in the sack.

Here is the couple breathing in some horse manure’s ass juice at a horse ranch earlier this week.

Hear her song in 3…2…1… Continue »

Shits about to go down at the Playboy Mansion.  TMZ reports there’s drama among Hugh Hefner’s sluts and Holly Madison is the worst one of all.

Holly wants editorial control of the magazine’s photo spreads, an issue not going over well with longtime Playboy employees.

There’s also major drama between Holly and Kendra Wilkinson, the airhead everyone at the mansion hates the most.  The two get into cat fights constantly, making it hard for producers to shoot the show.  Bridget Marquardt has been playing the role of moderator, trying to keep peace among everyone in the house.

This is a shame, because when I picture these three girls together it usually involves the three of them eating each other out while Hugh watches and tries to jerk off with his limp dick.  Having three girlfriends at once sounds like an absolute nightmare.  One’s bad enough!

What’s the point of having three women in your life if they’re not licking each others fish tacos?  Hugh needs to clean house and hire some fresher, drama-free snatch for us to jerk off to.

Here are Hefner’s three skanks at the AFI Life Achievement Award tribute to Warren Beatty held in Hollywood last week.

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Paris Hilton and her Army of Skanks whored it up in Vegas last Thursday.  The shameless socialite hammed it up for the cameras at Tao Las Vegas for the taping of Paris Hilton’s My New BFF.

I’ll be my left ovary and a beer that each one of these skanks has had at least 2 abortions.  What am I saying?!  That’s not realistic at all.  They’ve probably had more like 4 or 5.

More photos after the jump! Continue »

With a floundering music and film career, Puerto Rican diva Jennifer Lopez has decided to whore out her family to promote her clothing lines.

When it was announced that Jennifer Lopez would do a reality show, many wondered why she’d submit herself to an such an intrusion, not to mention the accompanying public scrutiny.

Now, a clue: J.Lo is gearing up to launch a new line of clothing, and, wouldn’t you know it, the creation of the line and the publicity from her show will dovetail nicely.

A source told OK! magazine that the idea behind the line is that Lopez “wants to look great in the gym and in the street.”

This isn’t Lopez’s only clothing brand: She created the J.Lo, Sweetface and JustSweet brands. Sounds like Lopez, who with husband Marc Anthony is raising twins (without a nanny!), is going to have plenty of material for the cameras.

Jennifer Lopez would have no problem eating her young if it meant a 7-figure paycheck.

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Lindsay Lohan’s mother, Dina Lohan, faces “immediate arrest and imprisonment” if she fails to appear at Family Court this morning.

According to ex-husband Michael Lohan, Dina has prevented him from see his kids. He also filed documents charging that Dina hasn’t brought their younger children to 15 of the 29 judge-ordered supervised therapist visits.

What the eff is wrong with Michael — someone had to be there were Ali got her lips done! Otherwise, who else was going to make sure Ali could still give blowjobs to executive producers?

On April 8, the father charges, Dina “arrived toward the end of the therapy session in a completely inebriated and erratic state.”

Dina had been “at the beauty parlor in anticipation of her impending trip to Las Vegas” for the show, Michael says in the heartbreaking papers, “and I attended the session with the children as scheduled. During the session, Ali requested that I watch her puppy while she was away, which I happily agreed to do. Ali called [Dina] to eagerly relay my consent. [Dina], clearly intoxicated, became irate. Without reason, she told Ali that I could not watch the puppy and that it had to stay in a kennel.”

On April 15, Dina was “exhausted” as she sat in the waiting room with the children, Michael claims in the documents. “I later discovered that [her] exhaustion stemmed from the fact that she was hung over. She apparently had spent the prior evening binge-drinking at various nightclubs until the wee hours of the morning. … She was spotted completely inebriated.”

He added, “Dina is a wanna-be living off Lindsay’s fame.  I gave her everything so I could see my kids.”

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get it. Dina’s a crazy bitch. But you’ve got to admit, Living Lohan is already your favorite new TV show. You don’t even need to be high to enjoy it.

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Did you guys see Living Lohan on E! last night?! It was trashtastic! Ugh, it’s pathetic how excited I was to watch it! The entire time I just kept shaking my head in disgust. That entire family is delusional, in particular Dina Lohan. And 14-year-old Ali Lohan wears more makeup around the house than I do to go to the bars. And I’m 10 years older than her!

In other Lohan news, happy lesbian couple Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson is said to be moving in together sometime real soon. Aw, young love. Tabloids are also said to be in a bidding war for Lindsay to come out of the closet exclusively on their magazine.

Lindsay is even talking about marrying Samantha at Dollywood (yes, the Dolly Parton theme park) in July. And while White Lohan won’t admit her daughter is a carpet loving lesbian, daddy Michael isn’t blind to the truth. He told Us Magazine Lindsay and Sam’s romance “is evident to anyone with half a brain.” DUH!

Dina keeps defending Lindsay’s sexuality, but in the end we know the truth. Those two are giving each other mustache rides and they love it!

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Want to take another look at Kim Kardashian’s ass, sans clothing? Here’s your chance!

Check out these screen caps of Kim mooning her family on Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Now if only she’d have flashed the front end too!!

Bald kitty in the hizzy!

Video after the jump! Continue »

The daughter of another C-list celeb is making waves.  Shayne Lamas, the daughter of Renegade actor Lorenzo Lamas, was recently seen playing in the sun in Malibu.

Shayne gained notoriety after have won over the love and affection of whatever dude was just in The Bachelor.

I guarantee you this Heidi Montag look-a-like will be in Playboy by the end of the year.  Another Hollywood slut seeking money and attention the only way she can: getting naked.