Dear pants and skirts, I’ll be vacationing in my native Puerto Rico during the coming week to go drink and work on my tan.
A friend of mine will be filling in while I’m gone, so you kids can still get your daily snatch fix. Have a fabulous 4th of July! Drink, smoke, eat, have sex… but just be sure to wear a condom! I’m so serious too.
Adios mis amores!
Kim Kardashian went shopping for furniture in L.A. last week wearing flared denim pants showcasing her number one asset perfectly.
Seeing these images one cannot help but wonder, does Kim have to purchase two seats when flying commercial airlines? I mean, there’s no way that ass fits in just one seat.
Earlier I posted about how I was upset with Kim Kardashian for failing to deliver any quality T&A.
Well, apparently now that Reggie Bush is thinking about making an honest woman out of her, she’s gone ahead and passed the slut torch to her sister Kourtney Kardashian. Poor Khloe, nobody wants her flashing her fish taco.
Here’s Kourtney Kardashian (aka, The Other Hot Sister) and Khloe Kardashian (aka, The Manly Looking Sister) getting paid to party thanks to their sister’s amateur porn tape.
I love Kourtney because she’s so desperate for attention she looks like she’d do just about anything to please a man. You could tell her to rub her face into your asshole and she’d do it. SMH.
More photos after the jump! Continue »
Megan Fox returned to Vancouver yesterday after being kicked off the set of “Jennifer’s Body” for having her lips enhanced.
It seems producers weren’t too happy with her change in attitude and image and asked her to leave the set for a week and straighten herself out.
Bet they weren’t too upset with her breast enhancement though. I know I wouldn’t mind, in particular if I got the chance to motorboat them every once in a while.
Following her checking into rehab earlier this February, Cuban-American stunner Eva Mendes says she’s happy with her life and just “taking a break and having a good time.”
Yesterday, after speaking with People Magazine, the “Once Upon A Time In Mexico” star said of her post-rehab days: “The sun’s out again. It’s my time.” She’s also been “sticking to [her] exercise regime” doing cardio and light weights four days a week.
“I’m actually taking advantage of my time off,” she says. “You know, I had a film that was pushed, so I’m home spending time with my family, going to the gym and actually enjoying taking care of myself …. This year has been great for me because I’ve learned how to relax. The last three years have been amazing but kind of crazy. So I don’t know, I feel grounded. I feel really good.”
“I’m getting a lot of love in the love department, too,” adds Mendes, who is in a longtime relationship with producer George Gargurevich.
Not only is Eva Mendes by far one of the sexiest women in Hollywood, but she’s also one of the sexiest Latina actresses — second only to Salma Hayek.
So here’s to one of Hollyweird’s care-free spirits staying young and fresh at heart. Because I’d much rather comment on Eva shopping, as seen here at the Mayfair Market over the weekend, then Lindsay Lohan and her STD infested crotch.
Bonus gallery after the jump! Continue »
Photographed exiting the Louis Vuitton store in L.A. yesterday, burgeoning amateur porn star Kristin Davis covered exposed hard nipples with a jacket on the way back to her car.
Once at her vehicle, the Sex and the City actress was all smiles as the cameras clicked away at her finding a parking ticket on her windshield.
Because once the entire world sees your vagina up close, what’s a little parking ticket in comparison?
More photos after the jump! Continue »
The only other half decent reason to watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Kim’s sister Kourtney Kardashian, gave us an cute upskirt moment outsite Mr. Chows last night.
I say cute because they that’s what bright Barbie pink and a design add up to: cute.
Anyhoo, so here’s Kourtney using the most out of her 15 minutes last night by giving us a slightly memorable upskirt moment. Aw, thanks Kourt!
Pacific Coast News apparently wans us to concentrate on how both Kourt and Robert Kardashian’s girlfriend Adrienne Bailon wore the same outfit to dinner, but when there’s an upskirt involved — who cares?!
Khloe Kardashian was also spotted getting her eat on with the gang at the trendy Asian eatery Mr. Chow last night, but you really could care less about this sibling so what’s there to tell.
More photos after the jump! Continue »
If one more person makes fun of Ashlee Simpson I might have to come over and pummel them with my ginormous German-made dildo.
And for the record, Ashlee was not drunk or high during that radio interview. No siree. I mean, sure, Ashlee was high on life, but who isn’t?!
This girl has the voice of the holiest of angels and could stop a bullet with one single note. That’s right. Ashlee’s voice is that good.
I mean, just look at her. The girl is wearing a ridiculous, I mean, gorgeous hat in a pool! Oh, that Ashlee. She’s so fashionably on point. I can feel your envy of her all the way over here.
Here’s Asshole Simpson and Pubic Wentz on vaycay in Jamaica earlier this week. That’s right, I said vaycay.
More photos after the jump! Continue »
Billy Ray Cyrus went on Ryan Seacrest’s KIIS-FM radio show this morning and denied rumors he deleted Lindsay Lohan’s cell phone number from daughter Miley Cyrus‘ phone after the girls traded phone numbers Grammy weekend.
He explained he didn’t delete Linds’ number, saying “We love Lindsay.” He then went on to say he wants to be Miley’s “best friend.”
“I wanna be the person [Miley] wants to talk to,” he told Seacrest. Fifteen-year-old Miley has a lot of friends, and “I just want to be one of those friends.”
Awesome. Because that’s what the world needs, another parent who rather be a friend than a parental figure. Did he not learn anything from White Oprah? I give Miley Cyrus a few more months before she’s caught snorting coke and sucking c()ck.
Anyways, here’s Leatherface Lohan showing off her splotchy skin while shopping Santa Monica yesterday. SMH. How does this skank not look at herself in the mirror and cry?
Oh, and btw, those patches of white aren’t skin discoloration. It’s dried jizz from getting gangbanged the night before.
Are we supposed to be surprised when we see candid photographs of Kim Kardashian? The girl has an effing reality show, for God’s sake.
Those photogs don’t care about her. They were there ’cause it’s part of their contract with E! I’m sure. Anyhoo, here’s Kim out and about in Beverly Hills Wednesday.
A little bird told me the secret to her ass isn’t ass implants, but actually fat injections to further plump her rear end. As for those lovely breasts of hers, that still remains a mystery.
