Hulk Hogan was photographed rubbing lotion on his daughter Brooke Hogan while sunbathing poolside at an L.A. hotel yesterday.

I mean, my dad and I are close, but not, like, incest close or anything. Hulk looks like he’s rubbing on the AstroGlide (the purple one is the best!) before he gets ready to mount her from behind.

Brooke Hogan and her abs of steel were spotted hanging out by the pool with a mystery man in L.A. over the weekend.

Noticeably absent: her ass.

I don’t mind a little meat on the bones, but some ass workouts never hurt anybody!

Brooke Hogan attends Florida Atlantic University’s final football scrimmage during the filming of her reality show “Hogan Knows Best.”

The walk of shame was especially embarrassing, as the other dogs raised their legs and did their thing. Sadly, that was the most attention any male has ever given Brooke.

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It’s bad enough Radar Magazine gave Spencer Pratt his own column, but now Brooke Hogan got her own effing show too?

Enough is enough. I’ll hire an ugly broad if she’s got personality, but why must celebrities who are unattractive — inside AND out — continue to profit at our expense?

All haters, chill. I’m not saying Brooke’s ugly, I’m just saying she’s not extraordinary. She’s average — and would I bother with ordinary?

And it’s not all about looks. A person with character can hold the attention of a person with conversation alone.

We’ve forgotten how to converse in America, instead always watching and discussing these stupid VH1 programs. I think it’s time for a Revolution. Who’s with me?

Here’s Brooke Hogan in bikini on the set of the reality show “Brooke Knows Best” in Miami Beach yesterday.

I’d say something mean about these photos of Linda Hogan in a bikini, but the woman is nearly 50-years-old and if you ask me, momma bear looks great.

Just don’t tell Brooke Hogan that. I think she still has her heart set on waking up a size zero one day.

Keep dreaming!

Brooke Hogan put to rest whatever rumors remain that her rack is real by making an ass of herself and putting herself in awkward positions showcasing her still-less mammaries while at the beach earlier during the week.

Those knockers are about as soft and inviting as cantaloupes.  And nobody wants to eff cantaloupes.

More photos after the jump! Continue »

Reality tv has claimed the relationship of yet another couple. Hulk Hogan’s marriage to Linda Hogan is coming to a close after more than 24 years together. I’d feel sorry for them except who couldn’t see this one coming? Anyone who goes on a reality show better not whine when their life starts to fall apart.

In the meantime, Brooke Hogan showed off her tanned tank of a body in Miami. Say what you will but the girl is looking good. There’s no way she’ll be Hollywood thin, but her body is as toned as I have ever seen it. She’s no Gisele, but I’d still whip out my strap-on for her.

More photos after the jump! Continue »

I’m not gonna lie, I think Britaloonie fan Chris Crocker looked damn hot at the Fox Reality Awards 2007 last night. (Minus the getup.) It’s sad when a tranny does his, er, her makeup better than most women.

Case in point was Brooke Hogan at the awards last night. Her false lashes were coming undone and I’m pretty sure her dead bleeding cheetah was still meowing. Not to mention she expanded the hole in the ozone layer with all that hairspray.

Who looks more fug: Chris Crocker or Brooke Hogan?

More photos after the jump! Continue »

Looks like Brooke Hogan is having trouble keeping her new “best friends” in place. Rumors have been circulating that the pop-star wannabe has recently increased her bust size, if only just slightly.  I say she should put rumors to rest, forget the bikini top, and just let those suckers go! Let them free to breathe that fresh beach air!

DO YOU BELIEVE BROOKE HOGAN HAS IMPLANTS NOW? Judge for yourself, BEFORE and AFTER photos of Brooke’s bust after the jump!

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WHICH WOULD YOU BANG, THE MANLY POP-STAR OR THE MANLY POP-STAR?