No One Ever Suspects the Nigerian Scammers Will Use Puppies

I have to imagine that these are harsh times for Nigerian email scammers.  Theirs isn’t exactly the freshest game in town – the whole “Repressive government froze my assets and I need to put the remainder of my royal fortune in your bank account for safekeeping” case has a lot of holes in it,  and email scams have been a punchline for as long as I can remember the internet existing.

Plus in these times of economic difficulty, it’s like, sorry your government froze your assets, but SunCruz Casino froze my assets, in a manner of speaking, and… I wish I could help, but I don’t have a “bank account” in the traditional sense.  Any more.  But scammers are wily like its their job, so they’re taking unusual measures to separate your money from you.

“I didn’t think they’d use puppies,”she said.

You never think they’ll use puppies.  

Poor Toni Miller, age 23 and a North Dakota woman born and bred, just wanted a Yorkshire terrier puppy to keep her company during the cold winter night when all of North Dakota is like, “Seriously, why am I living here.  It makes literally no sense.”

The “seller” e-mailed Miller back, saying the dog was no longer available, but a previous buyer may have some puppies available, as the man was a missionary who had been transferred to Nigeria suddenly and was worried about the dogs.

Miller e-mailed that person, supposedly named Jack Frazier Sneed, at jackfraziersneed@gmail.com. He told her, via e-mail, it would cost $500 to ship his two Yorkshire puppies to her in Bismarck. Miller wired the money to a shipping agent named “Roy Wallace.”

But then, drat!  The puppies got stuck at a London airport and the only way to get them on the plane was if $350 more got sent over the line!  Miller wired that money also:

“I’ve never … bought an animal overseas, so I really didn’t know if it was right or not,” she said.

(It wasn’t.)

The scammer then needed $250 more because the puppies started having second thoughts about flying and only exactly $250 worth of ice cream would help them come to their senses.  I’m afraid this is a sad story that ends sadly, with a sad ending:

Miller is aware she probably will not recover any of the money she wired, and she’s no longer looking for a puppy.

The lesson here is this: never buy a pet overseas unless it is a very specific endangered pet that you cannot buy or own legally in this country, like a crocodile.

Source: Bismarck Times.