The Fighting Asparagi and Other Bad William & Mary Mascot Candidates

The College of William & Mary in Williamsburg, Va., has gone a long time without a mascot.  The Indians until the ’80s, they’re now known as “The Tribe,” which is more politically correct, but the school lacks an official mascot.  Colonel Ebirt, an amorphous green blob, unofficially cheered the school’s teams on until 2005,  but, you know, weak.

So now the hunt is underway for a new mascot.  The Phoenix, bird of flaming plumage and Arizona, is one.  Another is “a stalk of asparagus.”  Why?  Some other winners after the jump…  

The asparagus stalk supporter notes that if served with cheese, the vegetable represents the school colors.

Also this:

Henry Broaddus, dean of undergraduate admissions, said in a different video that he’d like to see the “Revolutionary” considered for the position. He conceptualized it as “a  hybrid figure of Jefferson and Monroe who wields a quill pen…”

Hey Broaddus, how about just a big walking textbook that says “I SUCK” on the cover?

Other ideas include the wren, the brick, the ampersand (this thing: &.  Which would actually be a pretty funny and clever mascot if you think about it, given the school’s name.), and King William/Queen Mary.  It was once thought that using figures of royalty as mascots would not strike terror into the hearts of the opposing team, but I think a certain fast food ad campaign has challenged such assumptions.

Sources: The VA Gazette, SI.