Hey Women, Thanks for Ruining Sex

A new study by Polish sex man Professor Zbigniew Izdebski claims that a full one-third of men are “too frightened for sex” because women have unrealistically high expectations, a result of reading the sexy sex magazines with the perfume samples inside.

“Men feel they are judged by their women, who have been educated by magazines and know exactly how long foreplay should last, when to check the moistness of their vagina, the hardness of their nipples and body colour.”

Say what?  

“The whole methodology of the women’s climax is seen by men as something similar to a difficult intelligence test.

“Instead of enjoying the intercourse, men instead try to remember the ‘right’ routine. Consequently, we see more and more modern men ‘having headaches’ to avoid sex,” he added.

I think I get it.  It’s like how women are always complaining that they feel insecure about their body image because men’s magazines and skin flicks hold them up to unattainable standards.  So this is like, a revenge thing.

Men, watch this space for “100 Tips for How to Explain Why You Did Not Make Her Go Wild in Bed.”  Tip # 44: When she asks, “Is that all?” just respond, “Yes,” and point to any cover of Maxim.  This way, you will both not enjoy sex.  And that’s another thing in common you can bond over!

Source: Austrian Times via Spike.