Don’t Get This: Honda Insight Hybrid

Is there anything funnier than a snippy British man getting angry about progress?  Jeremy Clarkson’s epic three-page review of the Honda Insight in the Times of London should put the question to rest.  The Insight, as you may know, is Honda’s new hybrid-engined answer to the Prius, an attempt to recapture the share of the auto buyer market dominated by squirrel-hugging eco-pricks.  Clarkson rants, of the car,

It’s terrible. Biblically terrible. Possibly the worst new car money can buy. It’s the first car I’ve ever considered crashing into a tree, on purpose, so I didn’t have to drive it any more.

Words like “favour” and cricket metaphors, after the jump! 

And the sound is worse. The Honda’s petrol engine is a much-shaved, built-for-economy, low-friction 1.3 that, at full chat, makes a noise worse than someone else’s crying baby on an airliner. It’s worse than the sound of your parachute failing to open. Really, to get an idea of how awful it is, you’d have to sit a dog on a ham slicer.

You’d have to lock an Irishman in the same room as not-whiskey, am I right chaps??

The worst part about the car is that it runs on two motors, and as such is manufactured from uncommon materials that need to be expensively imported – which increases the carbon footprint of this automobile that will supposedly save the environment.

Why doesn’t [the hippie consumer] just buy a Range Rover, which is made from local components, just down the road? No, really — weird-beards buy locally produced meat and vegetables for eco-reasons. So why not apply the same logic to cars?

That’s right, ya fookin’ tossers, buy a proud British car!  Would Churchill have driven a Honda Fruitmobile over the Third World?

Also, it just occurred to me that “blogger” sounds like an insult a British person would yell at a fan of an opposing soccer club in a pub.  “Arsenal?  Buncha sissy-girls they are, ya fookin blogger!”

Source: The Times.