Sunday, May 11th, 2008
Maybe Jessica Simpson is Not So Dumb After All
After drinking at a Mexican restaurant with girlfriends last night, an intoxicated Jessica Simpson skipped getting behind the wheel and phoned her mother to pick her up.
A witness said of the B-list pop star, “Jessica was very drunk when she left and her mother had to come and pick her up.”
I got arrested for a DUI once. The chick in the holding cell with me was in her 50s, wearing daisy dukes and a t-shirt that read ‘It’s Only Stealing if You Get Caught.’
I wanted to ask her if she got caught with a penis in her snatch, but hookers are exactly the nicest of people. The last thing I needed was for her to cough up some hour-old cum on me.
In conclusion: Jessica is smarter than me.
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Topics: Jessica Simpson
[...] Jessica Simpson & Ashlee Simpson wrote an interesting post today on Maybe Jessica Simpson is Not So Dumb After AllHere’s a quick excerpt After drinking at a Mexican restaurant with girlfriends last night, an intoxicated Jessica Simpson skipped getting behind the wheel and phoned her mother to pick her up. A witness said of the B-list pop star, “Jessica was very drunk when she left and her mother had to come and pick her up.” I got arrested for a DUI once. The chick in the holding cell with me was in her 50s, wearing daisy dukes and a t-shirt that read ‘It’s Only Stealing if You Get Caught.’ I wanted to ask her if she got ca [...]
Damn it, just when I thought I wasn’t into Jessica, you post these pictures of her looking mighty hot. You get an extra point when you’re smashed, in my book.
[...] After drinking at a Mexican restaurant with girlfriends last night, an intoxicated Jessica Simpson skipped getting behind the wheel and phoned her mother to pick her up. A witness said of the B-list pop star, “Jessica was very drunk … Source: Maybe Jessica Simpson is Not So Dumb After All [...]
I wish…I really wish I could be this girls bikini bottom. Better yet, make that her thong! I love Jessica