Denise Richards Makes Me Wanna Watch Porn

So, I’m sitting in bed watching watching Chelsea Lately and reading a Rob Sheffield book when the commercial for Denise Richards‘ new reality show comes on the television.

Dude, that women is the effing devil. She introduces the show’s premise with this marvelous gem: “You’ve heard all the lies — something something, I stole my best friend’s husband, I’m a shitty mother, I suck as a human being, I’m a shallow whore — but now I’m here to set the record straight and tell it to you from my perspective something or another.”

Some words might have changed, but you get the jist of it. Essentially, Denise f^cks herself and everyone else over and still one’s sympathy and attention.

Simply put, the commercial was just so, so, sooooo bad. To the point where I had to watch porn afterwards to get it out of my mind. I mean, seriously, this c^nt cannot act for shit. At 37, Denise Richards is what Lindsay Lohan will become in another ten years.

Photos are from the she devil wiping out while surfing in Hawaii yesterday for her new reality show.

SplashNews

More photos after the jump!

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